The relief is head-smashing. I swear.

Fault

It’s barely past the first week of the new year yet I dare say that 2010 is a bad one. If only I knew how to make the right choices.

You are making my life miserable. It’s not supposed to be like this.

Resolutions for 2010.

Okay so I’ll be very very realistic about my resolutions. I don’t like saying stuff and later realising that I can’t cope with it.

Let us begin.

#1. TRY my best to be a good daughter to my parents.  My Definition: Not fight with my Mom over silly trivial matters such as cleaning my room and toilet and stop complaining to Dad about Mom even though its damn funny and he usually ignores me.

#2. TRY to keep my scholarship. My Definition: Save more money for my parents because I’m not going to make a resolution saying that I want to stop asking my parents for more stuff. I KNOW I will anyway so keeping the scholarship is the best way to save their moolah.

#3. CONTINUE to talk to God while I go about my daily chores and what-not.I recently started to put my trust in Him again. My Definition: I mean since I don’t pay attention in mass nor pray every night, I should at least spare him some of my time when I’m in the shower, on the bus, or just walking.

#4. BE a good girlfriend. My Definition: Actually, the best way is for me not to party so much and try to be by his side when he needs me. Some people has doubts about him, about us. But like others say. love is blind. I’ve cleared the air, I can see and I chose to stay by him. I’m keeping away my party lifestyle, cleaning up a bit and hopefully by tomorrow, we’ll be talking again.

#5. WORK on my silhouette paintings. My Definition: Practice enough on my own room walls before starting my own portfolio and maybe making a part-time job out of it :)

#6. BE a good friend. My Definition: Whether or not I hang out with you guys or not won’t make a difference. If I am there, I’ll always be a listening ear and a shoulder to cry on. If I’m not there, I’ll try to be there. 2010, means start of new relationships, friendship, everything. So don’t be so hard on me.

That’s about it. I drew and painted fairies and mermaids in my room. Haha.

The city lights will keep me going.

Waiting for you to return back to me.

Conformation.

Since almost everyone is saying goodbye 2009, I guess I should to before I miss the timing.

2009, hmm, I don’t really know where to start.

Well, getting my O level result slip sure was one hell-of-a-event. I could still remember so clearly walking into my lovely KC compound feeling nervous for the first time. Saw a colourful spectrum of emotions that spread across the wooden-floored hall .Got back the slip. I was satisfied and contented with my results because I achieved my goal to get less than 10 for my L1R4. In this case After I subtracted my CCA bonus, I had gotten 8. Then I realised that I didn’t have to worry a bit because I was already accepted into Singapore Polytechnic and into the course of my choice. The course that I have to stick to for the next 3 years, DADP.

But I had to get through DPA first which I did enjoy and did love the people. School started, I couldn’t have enjoyed myself more. Jumping into the right clique at the right time gave me lots of opportunities. Modelling gigs and parties with Harry’s workers. Comperes training and outings.I’ve snipped my hair off on impulse and had extensions.  I’ve been to F1 Rocks concert, I’ve been on stage, I’ve been on the backs on my friends while they carried me along the year and I’ve taken my turn to carry some as well. Got a chance to work with SIngapore’s Health Promotion Board, got a chance to try out a new sport out of my comfort zone. Got a chance to do a lot of things which I never regret trying. I got to paint my room and decorate it myself after 8 years. After all, we only live once.

Of course there are my IJ friends, friends that I will keep. Just to name a few, Jacinta, Sherilyn, Grace, Amanda, the list could go on. My dear EXCOs from Council, well, it keeps me rooted.

Relationship wise, 2009 seemed to have her fun messing me up in all directions. Love and friendship, we gain some we lose some right? Lost a friend that I have known for almost 5 years. I still feel sorry for what I’ve done but this is the new me, the new Sharon 2009 has brought it. I hope to find acceptance in the future years.

Talk about change, this year, I have. Physically, mentally, emotionally, everything. I’ve found a man who have accepted me all my ways, despite hating my party lifestyle, he still did. So I’m making an effort to cut down next year. Trust me on this one. Love you Reddy.

  

So maybe this year has quite an amount of ups and downs, but we all learn from our mistakes don’t we? :)

Happy 2010 everyone, tonight’s party is going to be a blast.

( haha, great, so much for cutting down right :D )

Thank You.

Thank you Mr Brightside for my Christmas present. He’s so cute cos’ he keeps thinking i don’t like it. It’s an ugly doll that he made from scratch and in fact, it IS REALLY UGLY.

But the more I look at it next to me before I sleep each night, the more cuter and sentimental it gets.

Maybe I’ve been so used to material stuff that simple gifts like these don’t really touch me unless I think awhile about it.

Well, I didn’t need to think long. Just as how you will eat my very failed cookies, I will like whatever you make for be with your own two hands. P.s, it really tastes terrible and the looks are deceiving. I can’t believe he ate half a jar in less than a day. I’m gonna be sued for murder.

Had ‘dinner’ with the campers.

Home.

I hate crowded places.

Even though I hate being alone, the comfort of my bedroom gives me the most secure feeling ever. Plaza Singapura and the travelling to and fro was driving me insane. The crowd was slowly killing my skin cells. You probably won’t understand my previous line. But i didn’t really have a choice cos we had to finish our ONOW preparations. Plus, Limin is as sick as me too.

 

On a lighter note, I caught this at the pick up machines. I won it at first try! :) hehe. I know, waste of money but I couldn’t help it.

 

 

After two years, I can still wear this shirt. And I’m still the same.

 

 

I HATE DOCTORS FROM POLYCLINICS. WHO SAID ITS NORMAL TO COUGH FOR 1-2 MONTHS MOTHER FUCKER!?!

Jonadab came over for lunch followed by him picking out my outfit for his project. Some music video thingy. After choosing for almost an hour we headed to Dover to meet the other group mates and started filming. Headed to the old Clementi railroad. Freaky much, walking on it.

I’m tired. Bye.

CHRISTMAS

I love my family. Plus my Dad who is not around, at least he bought me a bottle of limited edition Absolut :)  And I love grandpa as well. Even though he can’t remember me as Agnes’ daughter, sometimes he does remember me as Sharon and not someone else, so I’m thankful for that.

 

Just settled down in my bed for tonight. I miss Reddy. Oh well..

Cos’ this cycle’s starting all over again.

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Very over-dued photos.

 

Very over-dued photos since the 19th of December.

These few are at Ken’s place while he was busy with his new girlfriend (PIANO!) So Mr Brightside and I cam-whored all the way in which he barely smiled –.-

Then headed to Town for Comperes Christmas gathering.A few more photos that I got from facebook. Enjoy.

 

Hehe, I got Evan’s skinny legs in those two photos.

Yeah I wish I was THAT skinny.

:) The sense of satisfaction is awesome.

Hoho, I got my boots which I can wear tomorrow :)

Talking about tomorrow, I really don’t know what I should wear to fit the dinner followed by the party. Tsk,

 

 

And my not so successful cookies today :(

Cos you are the one that keeps my heart beating,

You are the one that I adore.

 

Okay so I drew this image this morning on top of my post board (please ignore the ugly man posing, it’s my birthday calendar) Wel,, I was inspired by the image below. Actually I wanted to draw more birds but I saw this image and tada!

Okay and I baked cookies too :) Hehe.

  I told you people love my walls. hehe.

Comperes Christmas Bash/ Modz outing overdue photos.

 

Modz recent dinner outing on the last day of school before the holidays started. As usual, we headed to Botak Jones without thinking twice.

Yesterday was .. hmm.. Headed to Ken’s place to chill out and I couldn’t tan cos it rained and I bought a $3 red umbrella which is very cute, and which i made my boy carry for me when we left Ken’s place. Got the present for my Christmas friend that the comperes planned.

Well, it was good I got to see Mr Brightside yesterday even though its like for only a few hours. He waited with me while the gift had to take 30 minutes to get wrapped –.-

Anyway, talking about money, you all have no idea how broke I am. WIth less than 20 dollars in my account, I cannot draw money and please please don’t say you’ll give me paper and pen cos’ I smack you. My mom is paying me 15 bucks on Monday and Tuesday to stay at home during the day.So by wednesday, I‘ll have 30 bucks I HOPE. Like cross-my-fingers-hope-not-to-die.

I need to buy paint.

NO MORE BUYING.

I think I should be banned from using the word ‘buy’.

Started designing and sewing at around 11pm and completed it around 5 hours later at 4am. Not bad for a first try aye?

Out With Grace (Bus Khaki)

 

Out with Grace my bus khaki in secondary school. I haven’t seen her since Family Day @ KC on March. We headed to good ol’  MOS for lunch before going to Marina to window shop and found a really nice wall to take a photo :) Then we decided to play the pick up machines where we DID catch toys! Hoho, I got the stich in exchange for the Mickey and I got her the Me-to-you bear in exchange for the Pooh bear. It was fucking hilarious how we kept screaming after each try.

   

At the Esplanade link and Esplanade itself.

I sure had a good time today. Now to just add some finishing touches to my report :)

Reverie: Cirque on Ice.

Honestly speaking, I had no idea what was going on throughout the performance. I had no idea if the little girl was a protagonist or something. But I did like the acts though and at one act, the lady had a nipple slip, at another, the guy was probably having an erection. Ha.

That picture was the only picture I managed to secretly take while pretending to yawn. Win.

Earlier today, I was woken up at 10 and dragged out of the house almost straight away for shopping at IKEA and Giant. I bought a new comforter to replace my current one cos’ it’s wearing thin. I’ve also finally completed my whole curtain set so I can finally, finally, put it up soon.

I love my new room, really. So right now, you can be jealous. Tee hee.

Under control

OKAY, everything is fine now. We’ve met up, talked and dealt with the matter ( I think?).

I is happy girl :)

Exco Dinner Photo entry.

Sherilyn my President, Suzanne my Head of Discipline.

  

On top is at Thaipan and ICC respectively followed by a photo of The President, Vice-president 1 and Vice-president 2.

Sometimes, I wonder how I actually became VP. Haha I bet Mr Meyer pulled me all the way up with his nonsense. hehehe.

Sweet.

“I don’t understand how a woman can leave the house without fixing herself up a little – if only out of politeness. And then, you never know, maybe that’s the day she has a date with destiny. And it’s best to be as pretty as possible for destiny.”

-Coco Chanel

I think that is so damn true.

Today felt exceptionally okay. I got to dress up and meet my Excos.(Y).

Pictures soon :)

Okay so I am attempting to make porridge with fresh scallops and smoked pork. I hope it turns out edible.

Sometimes, I feel like just tearing my chest open and eating my own heart. Fucker, I’m so hopeless.

One step at a time.

This feeling inside.

Like I just told Madelyn, this blog is about 3 years old (plus 2 months) and I read back on the old days. Ha, I sound so old. But I did anyway, and I see the changes I’ve made. These are the changes in me that I noticed and accepted. Some changes I tried not to keep, where some, I did. Not sure if that’s a good or bad thing but, who gives.

3 years. Woah, that’s kinda long isn’t it?

Singlehood to being attached to singlehood again to being attached to my nonsense ways and being attached again. What a life. And those parties. Wow, wow , love those parties I’ve been too. Drinking till I get drunk dancing till my feet ached and when we just sit and stone and mumble about our lives. And I have yet to enter a club! (btw, the parties are house/chalet parties, no clubs for me ).

Yes, maddy, I’m blogging again and I love you for being one of the milestones in my life. You bring me never ending joy and is the only girl who will talk to me in the middle of the night like at 3am.

Reddy, even though you probably wouldn’t chance upon this, and even though you are mad at me still, I’m still gonna say and tell the whole world how much I love you. I know, love is a strong word. And people out there who dislike me would probably say I’m being foolish. But no one except the person herself would know what love feels like so shut the fuck up. Back to my point, Reddy I’m sorry I’m not perfect and I can’t possibly be what you want me to be all the time. But I’m trying to become better. Not only for you but also for myself. I know you are pissed at me, so I’m gonna stay quiet. I hope, you talk to me soon.

And so here is how I’m gonna end my 2009. An awesome party with the Modz :) I swear I love them to bits.

I’m gonna wrap my love’s present now

:)

So I went out with my Mom to do MORE Christmas shopping and boy oh boy, did we buy tonnes of stuff. Hmm, why should I complain? I bought a bottle and a mug for myself. Like finally. Haha. Now I don’t have to buy 80 cents water

in school just for the bottle. More motivation to drink water!

Ok this is an old photo of Polly and I. Sorry I ignored you last night, I was asleep. LOL.

I’m trying my best to mend the broken pieces, to sew the torn patches, to make things work out. I don’t know if I’m on the right track or doing the right thing. Am I gonna chase this pavement, even if it leads no where? Fuck that lyrics from a song and it’s damn cheesy.

I don’t know how to describe the situation to you readers but I’ll be fine, I can fix this, somehow. Obviously crying doesn't solve anything but when you are just at your lowest and most vulnerable, the best thing is to just , well, cry. I tried to solve things but oh well, maybe time is all we need.

And i wish I can post something happy or funny but there is nothing to write that good enough so i suggest going to :

www.mylifeisaverage.com

You will love it, trust me. Beats reading my blog since it’s so depressing.

I’ve been waiting for more than 12 hours..when will you stop ignoring me?

I’ll shut up and tolerate. I’ll be strong.

 

I’ll be strong.

I’m dying from the inside. I don’t understand why I’m always on the receiving end of hurt.

I don’t know how I’m gonna carry on, but I’ll try I suppose, just like how I always do.

I want your love and
I want your revenge
You and me could write a bad romance

I’m stuck right now.

I need a direction.

I pray to God, that he’ll give me an answer.

The day DADP 02 celebrated someone’s birthday

Today should be a memorable day for DADP02 student because this is the first time we officially celebrated our classmate’s birthday (Y).

And I fixed my voodoo, so Lee Ann, don’t laugh anymore.

Come to think of it, I just had to fix this. It meant too much. I can’t let you go like this.

For the sake of my sanity, I typed in Bad cough in mysterygoogle, and the result page say ‘Did you mean: that's pathetic’.

Annoying.

Class is boring. I shall eat my fingers.